After exposing Tom Waits’ Big Time last month to all you sinners, I developed a green-craving for a real stoner flick – a good-ole silly spoof, something off-beat, like Kung Pow. Surprisingly, this one has all the ingredients of a stoner classic, including a baby fight, a kung fu cow, a one-tit guardian angel and, most twisting, a tongue with a full face, including a mouth with another tongue!

Say what? Yeah, for a minute I thought someone had laced my weed or dropped some high-blotter acid in my booze. But I could still feel my legs, and I hadn’t pissed or crapped my pants, so I knew everything had to be OK. But, what the fuck?

Now, among all the other psychedelic shit in this film, add the fact you’re actually watching the 1976 kung fu classic Tiger & Crane Fist. Then, it makes even less sense when you find that the main character is actually super-imposed over the original flick with some great special effects. I mean, no shit! It’s really hard to tell who was in the original movie and who was added. So much, that the original has now been added to my rental list.

As far as the story goes, it’s a typical old-style kung fu flick. The Chosen One is born to save the world from the Evil Council. The Evil Council sends some crazy kung fu cat – that later calls himself Betty – to kill his two-tounge ass. He fucks it up and the Chosen One escapes to fight another day. He then finds the master, meets the girl, fights, looses, retreats, makes out with his one-tit guardian angel (who just happens to be his murdered mother), speaks to the Lion King ghost, returns to kill Betty and expose the Evil Council.

Too much for you? Well smoke a bowl, rent it (from your local video store), watch it, laugh, smoke another bowl , pass-out! Then, I’ll smoke another flick with you next month – who knows, maybe I’ll smoke two!